Posts Tagged ‘Yartzeit’

 

Death of a Horrible Relative

Posted on: February 12th, 2017 by Alden

imageWhen family members die, we strive to remember the best moments of their lives. We must also recognize the complexity of mourning when a person has suffered trauma at hand of a newly-departed relative. Although a response to death, this is a personal prayer of healing. It is intended for private use. Optional verses appear in [brackets]. Alternative word choices are separated with a slash (“/”).

Death of a Horrible Relative
Dad/Mom/_________ (other relative, name or relationship),
So many moments of pain,
So many chances for healing that you abandoned,
So much suffering that you caused,
And now, you are dead.
What is it that I/we mourn?
The dad/mom/_________ (other relative) we never had?
The loss of so much time and energy
To the misery you caused?
The hope that one day you would become
A person of integrity and valor,
Kindness and love?

As in life,
Your death brings mixed emotions,
Different for each of us in our family as we grapple to understand,
As we grapple to find comfort and peace.

G-d of Old,
[Where were You when our family needed healing?]
[Where were You in the pain the sorrow?]
Help me to let go of the false hopes and empty promises
That never came to be.
Teach me to accept my past as it was
So I can embrace a richer tomorrow.
Teach me to release my anger and pain
So that I may lead a life of awe and wonder,
Full of joy and laughter.
Help me to move on.
[Help me to forgive. So that one day I can say:]
May his/her soul be bound up in the bond of life,
[At long last,]
A living blessing in our midst.

© 2017 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved.

Postscript: See also “Grieving the Living.” Here’s a link to all of my Yizkor and memorial prayers.

Please consider making a contribution to support this site and my writing. For usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” For notices of new prayers, please subscribe. You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo Source: Alden Solovy

Yizkor for a Lone Soldier

Posted on: July 22nd, 2014 by Alden

IDF InsigniaYoung men and women from all over the world leave their families and come alone to Israel to live the dream of building lives here and serving our people in the military. The term is chayal boded – Lone Soldier – and Israel embraces them with love and care and, proudly but sadly, we also bury them with love and care. This is a new yizkor prayer for Lone Soldiers in the IDF, posted here in memory of Sgts. Nissim Sean Carmeli and Max Steinberg.

Yizkor for a Lone Soldier
G-d of the selfless,
G-d of the strong and the brave,
Grant a perfect rest among the souls of the righteous
To ______________________ [full name],
A chayal boded who died in service to Israel.
May his / her dedication serve as a shining lamp of courage and love.
Bless the souls of all who have died in the name of our safety and security,
Fighting violence and terror in the name of our people.
Men and women who,
Like ______________________ [first name],
Answered the call of honor and duty.
Grant him / her a share in the world to come.
Bless his / her family with solace.
Ease their minds and console their hearts.
We stand with the defenders of Israel.
We honor the guardians of Zion.
We hold dear the sentries of Am Kadosh.
And we stand with their bravery and their sacrifice.
May his / her memory be sanctified with joy and love.
May his / her soul be bound up in the bond of life,
A living blessing in our midst.

© 2014 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved.

Postscript:  Here’s a link to more prayers for Israel.

Please check out my ELItalk video, “Falling in Love with Prayer,” and This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day. For reprint permissions and usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” To receive my latest prayers via email, please subscribe (on the home page). You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo Source: WikiMedia Commons

Yizkor for a Soldier

Posted on: December 7th, 2011 by tobendlight

Vietnam MemorialThis is a yizkor prayer for soldiers. Thank you to the men and women who gave their lives in service to the lands I love: soldiers of the U.S. Military and the Israel Defense Forces. This is another in a series of focused yizkor prayer.  I recite it for Tom Christiansen z”l who gave his life in Vietnam. It appear in This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day from CCAR Press.

Yizkor for a Soldier
G-d of the selfless,
G-d of the strong and the brave,
Grant a perfect rest among the souls of the righteous
To ______________________ [name],
My [father / mother / sister / brother / child / wife / dear one/ friend]
Who died in service to our country during the
_________________________ [name of war or conflict].
May his / her dedication serve as a shining lamp of courage and love.
Bless the souls of all who have died in the name of liberty and democracy,
Soldiers and veterans,
Civilians and professionals,
Men and women who answered the call of honor and duty.
May their souls be bound up in the bond of life,
A living blessing in our midst.

© 2017 CCAR Press from This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day

Postscript: This prayer was first posted for the anniversary of the Pearl Harbor attack. See also “In Times of War” and three Veteran’s Day Prayers. It’s one of several focused yizkor prayer including: “In Memory of an Organ Donor” and “At the Hand of Violence.” Here’s a link to more yizkor and memorial prayers.

Please check out my ELItalk video, “Falling in Love with Prayer,” and This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day. For reprint permissions and usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” To receive my latest prayers via email, please subscribe (on the home page). You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo Source: WikiMedia Commons

After the Horror

Posted on: May 1st, 2011 by tobendlight

YomHaShoahCandleThis prayer can be used as part of a liturgy for Yom HaShoah, specifically for reclaiming life in the shadow of death. Since the wording is general, it can also be used as a meditation after any event in which many die and others live. Another prayer in my Yom Hashoah liturgy is called “Tears of Crystal, Tears of Broken Glass,” calling on the imagery of Kristallnacht. Click here for the entire Yom HaShoah liturgy. To listen while you read, please click on the triangle in the bar below. The text follows.

 

After the Horror
Hold fast to the breath of life.
Hold fast to the song of life.
Hold fast to the soul of life.

This is my sacred duty, G-d of old,
As survivor, as witness, as a voice of history and truth.
Why else did I live when so many died?
Why else do I stand when so many were put to rest?
Why else do I hope and yearn when so many were silenced?

Hold fast to awe and wonder.
Hold fast to radiance and light.
Hold fast to mystery and majesty.

This is my sacred duty, G-d of old,
As mourner, as testimony to horror and destruction.
What else remains? What else endures?
What more can You ask of me,
But to choose life in the shadow of death?

© 2011 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved.

Postscript: After the attacks in Toulouse, France, I wrote “At the Hand of Anti-Semitism: A Yizkor Prayer.” Yom HaShoah also reminds me of my gratitude and love for Israel, reflected in this piece, “Israel: A Meditation,” which is also part of my Yom HaShoah liturgy.

For usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” For notices of new prayers, please subscribe. You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter. If you use this prayer, please post a link to Facebook, your blog or mention it in a tweet.

Photo Credit: Highland Park Conservative Temple

Tears of Crystal, Tears of Broken Glass

Posted on: April 7th, 2010 by tobendlight

YomHaShoahCandleThis prayer is about the power of tears, both to hurt and to heal, and is appropriate for use commemorating Kristallnacht, Yom HaShoah and Tisha b’Av. Click here for a six-prayer Yom HaShoah liturgy.

To listen along as you read, click on the triangle in the bar below. The text follows.

Tears of Crystal, Tears of Broken Glass
My tears are crystal and broken glass.
They sparkle, they cut.
They heal, they wound.
They are daybreak and midnight,
Hymn and dirge,
Joyous celebration and lonely mourning.
My tears catch Your Divine Light,
Prisms casting colors across my days
And on my hands.
I pray to hold them gently,
With dignity,
With honor.

I am one of Your children,
One of those You love,
Comforted knowing that I, too,
Am one for whom You cry
Tears of crystal,
Tears of broken glass.

© 2010 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved.

Postscript: Please see the related prayer, “After the Horror.”

If you use this prayer, please click “like” on this page and subscribe. Please take a moment to post a link to your Facebook page, your blog or mention it in a tweet. Thanks. For usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!

Photo Credit: Highland Park Conservative Temple

For Bereaved Children

Posted on: March 25th, 2010 by tobendlight

Ami Birthday CakeThis prayer is dear to me. I wrote it on behalf of my daughters. It’s a father’s yearning for his children, my yearning for my daughters as I witness them struggling to cope with the loss of their mother. My wife Ami z”l died after a tragic fall. As a prayer for healing, it echos the themes in the Mourner’s Kaddish, recalling G-d’s majesty and holiness. This prayer appears in my new book, Jewish Prayers of Hope and HealingTo listen along as you read, click on the triangle in the bar below. The text follows.

 

For Bereaved Children
Father of Jacob,
Mother of Rachel,
Source of Awe and Wonder,
Cradle and Shelter,
Our children are lost in tears,
Crushed in sorrow,
Erased in loneliness,
Bent and broken,
Their hopes, dust…
Their joys, cinders…
Their dreams, shadows.

You who comfort Zion and Israel,
Comfort our children in this moment of grievous loss,
And show them the path from darkness to light.
Renew their hope,
Rekindle their joy,
Spark their dreams,
So that they, too, will know Your healing Power,
Your salvation and grace,
Your loving kindness.
Hold them,
Lift them,
Carry them,
Until, refreshed by Your spirit,
They walk upright once again,
Toward holiness and love,
With charity and thanksgiving,
Humility and strength,
In awe and righteousness,
To sing Your praise.

© 2010 Alden Solovy and www.tobendlight.com.All rights reserved.

Postscript: I’ve written this prayer is To Bend Light toward children — toward my children — in their grief. In doing so, I also Bend Light toward myself. Here are links to two mourner’s prayers: “After Shiva” and “For the Bereaved.” Please consider purchasing my new book, Jewish Prayers of Hope and Healing.

For usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” For notices of new prayers, please subscribe. You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter. If you like this prayer, please post a link to Facebook, your blog or mention it in a tweet.

Photo Source: Alden Solovy

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