Tag Archive for "grief" | To Bend Light

Posts Tagged ‘grief’

A Liturgy after Terror Attacks

Posted on: March 29th, 2016 by Alden

This is a four-prayer liturgy to be used after terror strikes. “For Terror Survivors” and “To the Terrorist” are from “A Liturgy for 9-11.” “Let Tranquility Reign” is based on Psalms 120-122. Options are shown with [brackets]; word choices with a slash (/). This liturgy also appears on ReformJudaism.org.

After a Terror Attack
Author of life,
Humanity has turned violent,
Crushing lives,
Upending dreams,
Attacking the heart of another city/nation
With vitriol and hatred
In (an act/coordinated acts) of calculated terror.

Source and Creator,
Grant a perfect rest under your tabernacle of peace
To the victims of terror throughout the world,
Men and women whose lives were cut off by witless aggression.
Today we (add/once again add) ______________ [insert city name]
To the list of places where innocents have been murdered and wounded.

Remember with love
The survivors of these horrors
Throughout the world.
Grant them shelter and solace,
Comfort and consolation,
Blessing and renewal.
Grant them endurance to survive,
Strength to rebuild,
Faith to mourn,
Courage to heal,
And devotion to each other.

Heavenly Guide,
Hand of love and shelter,
Grant the victims of terror Your protection,
Your wholeness and healing,
And Your peace.

For Terror Survivors
G-d of the survivor,
G-d of the mourner and the witness,
Grant solace and peace to those still held by physical, emotional and spiritual distress from acts of terror.

Remember now those who are suffering from trauma after the attack in ___________ [add the location].

Release them from visions of death and destruction.
Release them from guilt or shame, from fear or anger.
Bind their wounds with Your steadfast love.
Lift them on Your wings of kindness and grace.

Blessed are those who have found peace.
Blessed are those without tranquility.
Blessed are those who speak.
Blessed are those who stay silent.
Blessed are those who have healed.
Blessed are those who suffer.
Blessed are those who forgive.
Blessed are those who cannot forgive.

Blessed are You, G-d of healing, Source of strength for survivors of violence and tragedy in every land and in every age. Blessed are You, Source of hope and comfort.

To the Terrorist
You who would hold the sky captive,
The sea prisoner,
The land in chains…

You who hide in caves,
Retreat to the wilderness,
Disappear behind false names and forged papers…

You who smuggle guns and arms,
Hide rockets in cities and bombs in homes,
Build weapons against the innocent and the bystander…

You whose designs are destruction,
Whose plans are fear,
Whose joy is hate…

You who harden your hearts
And wrap yourselves in death…
What evil has robbed you of your love,
Your compassion,
Your goodness,
Your humanity?
What lies have invaded your minds
So that you choose to die in order to kill?

We who love our lives and liberty
Stand firm and strong against terror.
We will defend our nation and our people.
We will protect our land and our homes.
And we pray for you to find hope and comfort
In lives of peace.

Let Tranquility Reign
Some days,
Ancient One,
Some days the prayers
Of Your people
Are so close
We can hold them in our hands,
Feel them with our eyes,
Taste them with our breath.
They surround our hearts
To become our yearning.
They surround our song,
To become our grieving.
They surround our souls,
To become our pleading.

:רַבַּת שָׁכְנָה-לָּהּ נַפְשִׁי, עִם שׂוֹנֵא שָׁלוֹם
:אֲנִי-שָׁלוֹם וְכִי אֲדַבֵּר, הֵמָּה לַמִּלְחָמָה

“My soul has dwelled too long
Among those who hate peace.
I am for peace, but when I speak of it
They are for war.”

When will peace come,
Source of Peace,
When will sorrow be vanquished?
When will tranquility reign?

:יְהוָה יִשְׁמָרְךָ מִכָּל-רָע, יִשְׁמֹר אֶת-נַפְשֶׁךָ
:יְהוָה יִשְׁמָר-צֵאתְךָ וּבוֹאֶךָ, מֵעַתָּה וְעַד-עוֹלָם

“Adonai will guard you from all harm;
G-d will guard your soul.
Adonai will guard your going and coming;
Now and evermore.”

For You are our Hope.
Our Comfort.
Our Blessing.
Let those who cherish life
Bless this day and every day.

:לְמַעַן אַחַי וְרֵעָי, אֲדַבְּרָה-נָּא שָׁלוֹם בָּךְ
:לְמַעַן בֵּית-יְהוָה אֱלֹהֵינוּ, אֲבַקְשָׁה טוֹב לָךְ

“For the sake of my comrades and companions,
I shall say: ‘Peace be within you.’
For the sake of the House of Adonai our God
I will seek your good.”

Let these prayers ascend
To the lofty heights,
So that the nations,
And peoples of the earth,
Will rejoice in holiness,
Will rejoice in splendor,
And will rejoice, together, in righteousness.

“After a Terror Attack” is © 2016 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved. “Let Tranquility Reign” is © 2015 Alden Solovy andtobendlight.com. All rights reserved. “For Terror Survivors” and “To the Terrorist” are © 2011 Alden Solovy and tobendlight.com. All rights reserved.

Postscript: “After a Terror Attack” is an adaptation of “For Brussels.” “Let Tranquility Reign” first appeared on this site January 18, 2015. “For Terror Survivors” and “To the Terrorist” first appeared on this site on April 28, 2o11, as part of my “Liturgy for 9-11.”

Please check out my ELItalk video, “Falling in Love with Prayer,” and This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day. For reprint permissions and usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” To receive my latest prayers via email, please subscribe (on the home page). You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo Source: Spiritual Networks

For Brussels

Posted on: March 23rd, 2016 by Alden

A prayer of solidarity and healing after the terror attacks in Brussels. The closing stanza is written in English and the three official languages of Belgium: Dutch, German and French.

For Brussels
Author of life,
Man has turned violent,
Crushing lives,
Upending dreams,
Attacking the heart of a democratic nation
With vitriol and hatred
In coordinated acts of calculated terror.

Source and Creator,
Grant a perfect rest under your tabernacle of peace
To the victims of terror in Belgium,
Innocents murdered and wounded,
Men and women whose lives were cut off by witless aggression.

Remember the survivors of this horror.
Grant them shelter and solace,
Comfort and consolation,
Blessing and renewal.
Grant them endurance to survive,
Strength to rebuild,
Faith to mourn,
Courage to heal,
And devotion to each other.

Heavenly Guide,
Hand of love and shelter,
Grant the people of Brussels Your protection,
Your wholeness and healing,
And Your peace.

Guide divin,
Main d’amour et refuge,
Accorde aux peuple de Bruxelles Ta protection,
Ta guérison,
Et ton intégrité,
Et accorde-leur Ta paix.

Himmlischer Vater,
Hand voller Liebe und Geborgenheit,
Gib den Menschen in Bruessel Deine Vollkommenheit,
Deinen Schutz,
Deine Kraft zu heilen,
Und Deinen Frieden.

Hemelse Gids,
Hand van de liefde en onderdak,
Verleen de Brusselaars Uw bescherming,
Uw toewijding,
Uw genezing,
En Uw vrede.

Postscript: This is based on my prayer “For Paris,” which is why I selected this image to illustrate the prayer. It was tweeted by Le Monde’s veteran cartoonist, Jean Plantureux, better known as Plantu. Thank you to my friends who translated the closing verse: Carolin Melamed, German; Genevieve Begue, French; and the Dutch by a friend who asked to remain anonymous.

Please consider making a contribution to support this site and my writing. For usage guidelines and reprint permissions, see “Share the Prayer!” For notices of new prayers, please subscribe. You can also connect on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo credit: Jean Plantureux as shown in The Guardian

In Sorrow

Posted on: January 31st, 2016 by Alden

This is new a prayer for moments of sorrow, regardless of whether they’re tied to a particular event – such as a loss or trauma – or are more general feelings of depression or despair. Here’s a related prayer called “Seasons of Sorrow.” Both appear in This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day.

In Sorrow
Ancient One,
Send light into this darkness
And hope into this despair.
Send music into this emptiness
And healing into this aching heart.

Air.
All I need is air.
A breath to give oxygen
To the anguish within.
A breath to give voice
To the howl in my heart.
A breath to set me free.

I am undone.
Crushed silent by sorrow.
Bereft by loneliness and loss.
Still yearning for healing.
Still yearning for love.
Still yearning for You.

Ancient One,
Send light into this darkness
And hope into this despair.
Send music into this emptiness
And healing into this aching heart.

Postscript: This is one of the few prayers in which I use the same language for the opening and closing stanzas.

Photo Source: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service National Digital Library

For My Children as I Enter Hospice Care

Posted on: January 27th, 2016 by Alden

This is prayer of contemplation and love for a difficult moment that forces a family to recognize the fragility of life and inevitability of death. It appears in my book, Jewish Prayers of Hope and Healing. Optional inserts appear in [brackets]. Fill in details using the blank lines and following the instructions in (parentheses).

For My Children as I Enter Hospice Care
My G-d,
In the days ahead,
[The weeks and the months,]
I will face challenges as I surrender to _____________ (name of the disease).
My heart and my hopes,
My love and my questions,
Also turn toward my children [and grandchildren].
How will they cope?
How will they continue?
How will their experience of my passing
Shape their lives?

This I pray:
In the time that remains,
Let me be a source of love,
A light of comfort,
A lamp of hope,
A well of blessings.
Grant me the ability to care for my children,
Even as they yearn to provide support and understanding for me.

[Optional insert: Repeat the following paragraph for each child]
Bless my child ___________ (child’s name)
Who _____________ (thoughts about what he/she is feeling now)
With _____________ (specific concerns and prayer for that child).

G-d of health and healing,
Watch over my children
In their hour of need.
Watch over them when I have departed.
Let our love for each other
Shine brightly through the days ahead,
So that it lasts beyond the length of my days,
As a testimony to your Holy Name.

Postscript: Here are two additional prayers about entering hospice. Other healing prayers from Jewish Prayers of Hope and Healing include: “For Surgery,” “Upon Recovery from Surgery,” “For a Critically-Ill Child,” “For a Critically-Ill Mother,” “For a Critically Ill Father” and “For Healing the Spirit.”

Photo Source: Here Women Talk

After Miscarriage or Stillbirth

Posted on: January 17th, 2016 by Alden

This prayer, to be said by a woman after a miscarriage or stillbirth, attempts to capture the pain and grief following this devastating loss. It asks G-d to witness the sorrow and begin the healing. Since some may not feel the potential for healing, there’s an optional line in [brackets] to honor that sentiment.

After Miscarriage or Stillbirth
Source and Shield,
You have made my body
To be a fountain of life,
A well of strength,
To take seed into the warmth of my womb,
To feed and hold,
To love and shelter,
To awaken new life.

Oh grief,
I am stripped bare,
The cradle of my body empty,
My heart bereft.

Oh sorrow,
My soul yearns, aches, weeps
For the one who will never rest in my arms.

Oh G-d,
Witness my distress,
My suffering and loss.
When will the days bring comfort and rest?
When will the nights bring solace and peace?
Hear my prayer.
Lead me on a path,
G-d of our mothers,
G-d of generations,
[A path that now seems so distant, so remote,]
A path of wholeness and healing.

Postscript: Here are other prayers of grief: “Loss of Pregnancy,” “Loss of Pregnancy (Husband/Partner),” “Hard Mournings,” “After Shiva” and “For the Bereaved.” Many of these prayers appear in my book, Jewish Prayers of Hope and Healing.

Photo Source: Blunt Moms

Pour Paris

Posted on: December 23rd, 2015 by Alden

This is a full translation of a prayer of solidarity and healing “For Paris” that I wrote immediately after last month’s terror attack. The original prayer includes one closing paragraph translated into French.

Pour Paris
Auteur de la vie,
L’homme s’est tourné vers la violence,
Ecrasant des vies,
Bouleversant des rêves,
Attaquant le cœur d’une nation démocratique
Avec vitriol et haine
Avec des actes de terreur coordonnés et calculés.

Source et Créateur,
Accorde un repos parfait sous ton tabernacle de la paix
Pour les victimes de la terreur à Paris,
Innocents tués et blessés,
Hommes et femmes dont les vies ont été tragiquement écourtées.

Rappelle-toi des survivants de cette horreur.
Accorde-leur un abri et du soulagement,
Du réconfort et de la consolation,
Une bénédiction et un renouvellement.
Accorde-leur l’endurance de survivre,
La force de reconstruire,
La foi pour se lamenter,
Le courage de guérir,
Et la dévotion à l’autre.

Guide divin,
Main d’amour et refuge,
Accorde aux peuple de Paris Ta protection,
Ta guérison et ton intégrité,
Et accorde-leur Ta paix.

Postscript: Thank you to my friend Cantor Sheri Allen for sending this translation by Gary Goldman. Here’s a link to the original English version of the prayer. My prayer “For the Jews of France,” written in March, 2012, after the deadly anti-semitic attack in Toulouse, has also been translated into French.

Photo credit: One of many adaptations of original art by Jean Jullien.

For Paris

Posted on: November 14th, 2015 by Alden

This is a prayer of solidarity and healing after Friday night’s terror attack in Paris. Here’s a link to this prayer translated into French.

For Paris
Author of life,
Man has turned violent,
Crushing lives,
Upending dreams,
Attacking the heart of a democratic nation
With vitriol and hatred
In coordinated acts of calculated terror.

Source and Creator,
Grant a perfect rest under your tabernacle of peace
To the victims of terror in Paris,
Innocents murdered and wounded,
Men and women whose lives were cut off by witless aggression.

Heavenly Guide,
Hand of love and shelter,
Grant the people of Paris Your protection,
Your wholeness and healing,
And Your peace.

Guide divin,
Main d’amour et refuge,
Accorde aux peuple de Paris Ta protection,
Ta guérison et ton intégrité,
Et accorde-leur Ta paix.

Photo credit: Grazia

Birthday, No More

Posted on: August 20th, 2015 by Alden

Here’s a prayer to be said on the birthday of a deceased loved one. My sense of sorrow and loss return on the birth dates of my dad Jack z”l and my wife Ami z”l. Word choices are separated with a slash (“/”). Optional lines appear in [brackets]. This appears in This Grateful Heart: Psalms and Prayers for a New Day from CCAR Press. I also use this prayer on Father’s Day and, thinking of my children, on Mother’s Day.

Birthday, No More
This empty space in time,
In my heart,
Is yours dear ___________ [relationship].
It is the space for yearning,
The space of memory,
The day your light came into the world.
A day of sorrow for what was lost,
Birthdays that will never be.

This day touches
The depths of my grief and loss.
This day touches
A wound and makes it new.

G-d of generations,
Be with me [and my/our family]
As we remember what was
And what might have been.

I/We miss you.

Postscript: I’m posting this in memory of my father, born August 20, 1925. On that same date, 63 years later, he received his cancer diagnosis and died 10 days later, August 30, 1988, corresponding to 17 Elul 5748. Some of my other prayers about death include: “Near the End: A Meditation,” “On Removing a Child’s Life Support,” “Meditation on the Burial of a Young Child,” “On the Journey to My Child’s Passing,” “After Shiva” and “Shall I Cry.” Here’s a list of memorial and yizkor prayers.

Photo Source: WikiMedia Commons

Chukat: Living Waters

Posted on: June 21st, 2015 by Alden

In Chukat, this week’s parasha, the prophet Miriam dies. After she’s buried, the scene abruptly shifts to the lack of water in the wilderness. We’re left wondering: How did the people mourn her loss? To get water, G-d tells Moses to gather the people and speak with a rock. Instead, Moses strikes the rock with his staff. Water pours out. Rabbi Sharyn Henry notes that Moses hasn’t yet mourned for Miriam. Striking the rock, she says, is his reaction to unexpressed grief. The water and his tears are the same. This prayer is based on Rabbi Henry’s midrash.

Living Waters
Let the well of living waters
Flow through me
From the Source,
From ancient pools
Of holiness and light,
Ancient pools that sustain the body
And soothe the heart.

My grief has turned
My heart to stone,
My sorrow and loneliness
Have hardened my veins.
Crack me open with Your divine rod.
Release my tears with your staff.
Let me know wholeness
And peace,
Once again.

Postscript: As a result of striking the rock, Moses is denied entry to the Promised Land. Rabbis have struggled with explaining why so small a sin would yield so major a punishment. One common explanation is that, with his act, Moses diminished a miracle of G-d. I propose taking Rabbi Henry’s midrash a step further to explain Moses’ punishment, as well. Moses has a direct and intimate relationship with G-d; we’re told that that relationship is unlike any that came before or will come after. Instead of turning to G-d for healing, Moses holds his grief inside and finally lashes out. He, of all people, should have known to turn to G-d. Perhaps his sin can be understood as withdrawing from G-d. For Moses, that would be quite a sin, indeed.

Photo Source: Diodocs

For Mother Emanuel / Church of the Multiplication: Racist Violence against Houses of Worship

Posted on: June 18th, 2015 by Alden

On Wednesday night, nine people were killed during a shooting at Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal (AME) Church, an historic black church in Charleston, S.C. The oldest AME church in the south, it’s referred to as “Mother Emanuel.” Across continents Thursday morning, arsonists set fire to the Church of the Multiplication of Loaves and Fish on the Kinneret (Sea of Galilee). Most of the damage occurred roof; two people suffered smoke inhalation. Given the time zone differences, these acts of violence and cowardice — the preparations, the police responses — were quite possibly playing out at the same time. Here are two prayers in response.

For Mother Emanuel: A Memorial and Healing Prayer
Author of life
Source and Creator,
Grant a perfect rest under your tabernacle of peace
To those who lost their lives the attack on Mother Emanuel,
Whose lives were cut off by violence,
An act of witless aggression.
Put an end to anger, hatred and fear
And lead us to a time when no one will suffer at the hand of another.
May their souls be bound up in the bond of life,
A living blessing in our midst.

G-d of justice and mercy,
Remember the survivors of this attack,
And the victims of any disaster,
Any violence, suffering or despair.
Grant them shelter and solace,
Comfort and consolation,
Blessing and renewal.
Grant them endurance to survive,
Strength to rebuild,
Faith to mourn,
Courage to heal,
And devotion to each other.

Heavenly Guide,
Hand of love and shelter,
Grant the people of Mother Emanuel Your protection,
Your wholeness and healing,
And Your peace.

Racist Violence against Houses of Worship
Oh people of conscience,
Cry out.
Cry out against arrogance.
Cry out against hatred and anger.
Cry out against violence and oppression.
For G-d requires us to stand
In the name of justice and freedom,
For G-d requires us to oppose terror,
To muster our power and energy
Against racist aggression
And to protect all houses of prayer.

Oh G-d,
We implore You,
Look down upon the suffering
Perpetrated against churches, mosques and synagogues,
Against houses of worship in so many lands,
By the hand of wickedness,
By the hand of malevolence,
By the hand of ignorance and sin.
Today we remember, with sadness, the attacks on
Mother Emanuel and the Church of the Multiplication
And the loss of precious life.

With Your gentle and loving hand,
G-d of Shelter,
Unite all of your children
Under Your canopy of hope and love.
Bring the light of salvation and healing
To the four corners of the earth.

Postscript: The prayer “For Mother Emanuel” is an adaptation of “Violence in Mumbai.” The prayer “Racist Violence against Houses of Worship” is an adaptation of “For the Yazidi People.”

Photo Source: Wikipedia

Posts Tagged ‘grief’

A Liturgy after Terror Attacks

For Brussels

In Sorrow

For My Children as I Enter Hospice Care

After Miscarriage or Stillbirth

Pour Paris

For Paris

Birthday, No More

Chukat: Living Waters

For Mother Emanuel / Church of the Multiplication: Racist Violence against Houses of Worship

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